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How affected are you, as a Black/Brown mother, by cultural conditioning?
What aspects of cultural conditioning are affecting you as a black/brown Muslim mum?
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What were you told about marriage and motherhood as a Muslim woman?
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You were given no specific instructions
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsYou were only encouraged to marry within your own cultural
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsYou should prioritise raising a family over education and career
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsYou should focus on education and career above all else
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Which of the following aspects of cultural conditioning are affecting you as a black/brown Muslim mum?
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Societal pressure to conform to traditional gender roles.
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsExpectations to prioritize the cultural values of your ethnic background rather than your own personal beliefs.
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsPressure to assimilate into the dominant culture and abandon aspects of your own cultural identity.
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsLack of representation and recognition of black/brown Muslim mothers in media and society.
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What advice were you given about raising your children as a black/brown Muslim mum?
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You should raise your children strictly according to cultural norms and traditions.
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsYou should prioritize your children's individuality and allow them to shape their own identities.
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsYou should focus on teaching your children the values and principles of Islam.
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsYou were not given any specific advice about raising children.
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Which of the following expressions of cultural conditioning impact you as a black/brown Muslim mum?
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Feeling pressure to conform to societal beauty standards that don't align with your own physical appearance.
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsSense of guilt or shame for not being able to speak your ancestral language fluently.
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsExpectation to prioritize the happiness and well-being of your extended family over your own.
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsFeeling a constant need to prove yourself and overcome stereotypes and biases.
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How do you feel when you're parenting in front of your in-laws, parents, family members, and extended community?
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I worry about their judgement
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsI worry about what they will think about me as a Mother
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsI’m not bothered about what others think as I know I am trying my best.
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsI know that not everyone will understand the way I do things.
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsI end up shouting at my child and controlling them because their comments are too much to handle. I am told "I am too soft"
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What do you find yourself doing the most in your parenting and inside your home?
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Hitting, Shouting, Threatening and Punishing
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsTrying to understand my child and hold space for them
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsValidating and supporting my child
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsSupporting them through their feelings as best as I can
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsAll of the above
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What do you do when your child doesn't listen?
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Shout, Hit and or threaten them
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsI think they are just spoilt kids and get frustrated
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsI feel out of control and want to cry
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsI really try to hold space and validate their emotions but get tired.
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsI am able to regulate myself and validate my child’s feelings.
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsI am able to keep calm and not make it about myself
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What is your opinion on 'tough love'?
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They need it, it's important otherwise they'll grow up spoilt
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsThey need discipline
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsNot necessary there is no such thing as tough love.
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How do you handle your child's big emotions?
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I use distractions and sometimes bribe them
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsI feel really frustrated and look for anything to make them be quiet
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsI don't know how to handle it
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsI end up shouting and having my own emotional outburst
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsI am able to remain calm and be a safe space for my child
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How supported do you feel in your motherhood journey?
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I feel really lonely, isolated and breaking cycles alone is almost impossible
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsI’m surrounded by loved ones but they don’t understand and I feel alone
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsAlhamdullilah I have like-hearted family and friends
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsI am yet to find a community and a village
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsView All Assigned TagsI have a brilliant village both offline and online
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